New Year 2005

I have been enjoying this 'time out' with my family in Winnipeg, trying to recharge and sort through the profound events in my little life.

I like having a small invisible life. I like the fact that I am very aware that I live my little life before the Lord Himself, and that in the midst of the many storms swirling about me, it is for Him alone I am here.

How can it be that my little existence gives Him joy and pleasure ? I really have no idea, but it makes me glad to remember this from time to time. When I feel so alone and forgotten He reminds me that 'I will never leave you !'

If I like being invisible, why then does it bother me when I feel forgotten and unloved ? Funny eh ? ......I know, I'm so weird.
Anyway, I have been able to begin to hear again the whisper of His words as He draws near and encourages me in the grieving process.

We are on the brink of a new year. In other years I have not had any hopes or dreams for my future. Another year meant nothing to me in the place of captivity I had endured.

Now all that has changed ! There is a new direction and a turning in the road that I had never imagined possible at this time of year. I am amazed and very grateful that Jesus never gives up on us even when we may have given up on ourselves.

BEHOLD I MAKE ALL THINGS NEW !

'For you who fear My Name, the Son of Righteousness will arise with healing in His wings. And you will go out and leap like calves released from the stall.'

'Then those who feared the Lord talked with each other and the Lord listened and heard. A scroll of remembrance was written in His Presence concerning those who feared the Lord and honored His Name.'

Imagine this...a letter of recommendation so to speak...written in His Presence...concerning me....I like that thought Lord.

'They will be mine says the Lord Almighty in the day when I make up my treasured possession.'

On this the eve of the New Year 2005, it's TIME...it's time for me to move forward ...time to live in Truth...NOW...it begins.

I have a Father who loves me, and tells me to take 'only what you need' into the New Year, and don't be afraid anymore.'

So tonight I bind myself to the will and purposes of God for my life, and step put of the boat once again....and I choose Life !

(Trenton Journal Dec.31, 2004)

Farewell

This has been quite a week. Today the other lady here and myself took a short drive to a lovely bay. Here we released the remains of my Aunt as she had requested.

The weather was cold and it started to rain just as we were leaving, but that didn't matter. A quiet, final farewell. We will meet again soon, and it will just seem like a moment.

God is so Good. He has set my feet on an incredible path and I am moved at His trust in me to accomplish His plan.
I love Him so much, there are no words to express my devotion, just a sense of bowing low before my Bridegroom, King and Judge.
I am His alone, He is always Enough, but He is constantly giving more of Himself to me.

Last night I fell into bed exhausted and a phrase I have heard Gary Wiens use a lot passed through my heart. UNDER THE MERCY.....and I wept that I had no strength to even pray ... MERCY HIMSELF MET ME HERE.



(Trenton Journal Dec.10, 2004)